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Helen Sword's avatar

Helen Claire, a talkative little girl with a blonde ponytail and two missing front teeth, has just told me that it's time for me to stop tap tap tapping away on my computer or phone, thinking that I'll find all the answers there. Instead, she says, I should give Freddie a cuddle, then sit down on the floor with my colored paper and scissors and glue and start making something. The questions will arrive as soon as I start moving my hands, and the answers will follow.

Happy birthday to Abe!

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Margy Thomas's avatar

Coming in late with my reply this time, as I’ve been celebrating my 11 (!)-year-old’s bday all day today! 🥲

I tried a “meet your inner child” guided meditation a couple years ago, where the narrator leads you through an imaginative process of meeting your inner child in a walled garden to ask what’s on their mind and what they want and need so that you can use this insight to understand who you are in the present day. The idea is that the wisdom of your inner child can help cut through the ambivalence and ambiguity of adult life to connect you with what is essentially you and essential to you.

At the culmination of this whole long mediation -- that I had thought might lead to my inner child pouring out tons of useful advice for me since I was a big talker as a child -- my inner child had only one word for me: “Adventure.”That was it. Make sure that life feels like an adventure.

This message has been so clarifying ever since, helping me let go of many things that I had felt like I “should” care about. The world is full of success metrics. But the one that will actually help me do the work that I’m here to do (and feel like it’s even worth it to try) is the question of whether it feels like an adventure. Am I taking risks? Learning new things? Feeling invested in the process as it unfolds? Outmaneuvering mortal peril every now and then? And am I narrating to myself a fascinating life story as I go along, regardless of whether anyone else ever hears it? These are the things that matter.

I still love this advice from my wise inner child. Thanks, little Margy :)

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